Cherry Pop

You know, I am sometimes convinced I have been whisked away to a parallel dimension; to another plain where logic no longer exists. This conviction tends to wash over me when I come across a story such as this one.

Once upon a time there was a man with a runny nose. He happened to be in a queue of traffic at the time and, when all the vehicles came to a halt, he blew it. And when I say ‘he blew it’ I am meaning two different things. Firstly, he blew his nose and, secondly, he blew his chances of continuing to have a squeaky-clean record with the police.

Yes, you guessed it; he was stopped and fined for ‘clearing his sinuses whilst in control of a motor vehicle’. If it wasn’t so sad it would be funny.

Do our police have nothing better to do with their time, for God’s sake? There are all kinds of terrible crimes going on around us and the cops are busying fining people for blowing their noses. It is a bit of a concern, isn’t it? When it all goes to court I just hope there is a judge who will see what a terrible waste of time and money this is. If anyone is to be fined, then it should be the painfully pedantic police officer who issued the ‘nasal offence ticket’ in the first place.

Actually, if I think back to my days of revising the Highway Code, I am pretty sure there was a law against ‘blowing your hooter’ at certain times of the day…

When George Orwell wrote ‘1984’ he came up with several unique offences such as ‘Thought Crime’, ‘Hate Crime’ and ‘Sex Crime’. However, not even he (with his genius imagination) could have come up with something as twisted, macabre and horrible as ‘Nose Crime’.

And another update, I have finally finished all the copy for the vaser lipo London webpage. I am rather confused how I feel about this one, any remarks